I know this is a long entry……but there is no way to explain the experience other than what follows.
Mr. Law called while I was on break at work & his first question to me was “So why did your last relationship end?” I said I didn’t feel like talking about it and fired the same question back at him. It turned out that his last major relationship was almost 4 years ago & she was married at the time they met & started dating. She wanted out & used him to do so. They lived together for a couple of years & she grew tired of him not making the money she wanted to be supported with so she left him to pursue older, richer men. Ummm…..you dated a married woman idiot. This had made him bitter towards NY women.
We chatted more & I had to get going because I had class.
He called me right after that next class and I picked up. Big mistake. I said “Hello?” He said “Hey you”. Whoah! I already don’t have a name & I’m a “hey you” person on the list. I don’t like that. His first question was “I hear the internet has caused a huge problem with plagiarism at the college level. How do you deal with this?” An odd question, but I answered. He then said “Okay, but what if they take info from various sites & you can’t find one specific source that they downloaded a paper from?” I answered that as well. “But what if they’ve just read the piece a lot and have discussed it with other teachers, say from high school, and they don’t even realize that their idea isn’t really theirs? Isn’t that plagiarism? And how do you deal with that?” I shot back with “Counselor, I feel like I am a witness being badgered” (he laughs) and I continued “Do you talk like this to everyone?” He said “No”. I said “Then you just speak to me this way?” “No.” I laughed and said “then what is it?” He became a bit agitated and said “I thought you wanted someone who connected with you on levels and I am trying to show you that I am keeping up with your profession and that I understand what it is you go through”. Oh if he only knew what I really go through. I replied with “Well, that’s very nice but I don’t define myself wholly by my job. I want to connect with someone on levels of conversation, movies, values, food, music…….. have you ever had a song stuck in your head and you tried everything to get rid of it but it isn’t working?” So he asks “What is the group?” Now, I would have asked ‘what song’ but not Mr. Law. I told him Nickelback. He said “Who? I’m old remember? I don’t know the names of these new little groups.” “Hello? They are not a new little group. They have been around a couple of years and opened for Bon Jovi this past summer. As well they just had concerts in the city in November.” He was silent and said “Oh yeah?”
At this point I said I had to go but I could call him for my ride to my next stop if that was okay. He said fine.
I like talking on the phone while I drive because it limits the time I have to talk to someone. especially when I am not sure I want to, or should be talking to, that person. So when I called back he answered “hey you”. I just said “Hi. Mr. Law. It’s Grotter”. I asked him if he had bothered to look up Nickelback and he hadn’t. I pointed out that if was taking an interest in such a younger woman he would have done so already.
Moving on I asked him if he was still going to Fla. that upcoming weekend. He said that his friend backed out & he wished he had a girlfriend to go with instead. I said I wish I was just going to Fla….with someone or alone…..wouldn’t matter to me. It’s at this point he says “So come with me.” Kidding around I replied “Okay”. He was shocked & silent. I giggled and said “Lighten up. I was kidding!” He said “We could get separate rooms if you didn’t want to share.” I said “I can’t go away with you. I haven’t even met you yet”. “No really, we can get separate rooms That’s okay with me”. BELLS AND WHISTLES GOING OFF BIG TIME!
“Ummm……no. Sorry but I have this policy that I don’t go away with men I don’t know. Call me crazy but it’s worked for me so far.”
So I told him about Cowboy because he asked again & then he said “Describe him to me. Age, height, hair & eye color, education, job” I said “Why?” He said it would give him insight into the kind of guy I go for. Well, I pointed out that it didn’t work and I may not want that type again. I also pointed out that he is too hung up on the education thing and just because you have a degree doesn’t make you a genius in the dating world.
I won’t go on much longer. But I will say that this guy is already trying too hard in that he thinks he knows women and yet is applying all of the wrong issues to me. He asks me a question, interrupts my response and tells me how I am wrong about something specific to myself. I would meet him for coffee…..who knows why….but I had this feeling that I would be walking out leaving him there. Just a hunch.none