I was all set to meet Mr. Law at 9pm at B&N for coffee & conversations. We left off with I would call him to let him know I had finished at work & was on my way. I called at 8:55 to say I would be there in five minutes. He says he’ll be there at that time, too. I said I wanted to look for a book I needed & this is where it gets weird:
“So do you want me to go to TJ Max while you look for the book?” “No. You can look in the store, too, if you want.” “Well, I just don’t want you to think I am smothering you if I tag along.” “Umm….well, we are meeting in a bookstore so why not look around while we are there?” “Do you want to go to the gym with me? We could do that instead.” “I just came from work & am all dressed and I don’t go to gyms, and we did say we’d meet for coffee.” “I guess you’re right, but I have a visitor’s pass if you want to go.” “Again, thanks, but no. I am all dressed & have no clothes to use for working out.” “Well, we could sit in the sauna and talk.” “You can go to the gym and I will be at the store buying my book & getting coffee. I will be on the second level in the far right-hand corner.”
I get there precisely at 9pm and go off to find my book. I figured he’d be there within 5 minutes so I stalled, hoping to meet in the rows of books rather than right in the front of the store where all can see & hear us greet eachother for the first time. 9:10……9:20……no word……9:25 I decide to get on line & buy my book so I can go home. I had decided I didn’t really want to meet him and was only going through with this because I have found that if I take all opportunities, the one I really want does come along. Whereas if I close one door too soon….there aren’t any open.
Well, there’s one clerk at the registers and the customer up there is arguing something about her membership lapsing but she wants to renew at the un-lapsed price. So it takes a few minutes before the clerk can help me. Isn’t that when he texts me? “Where are you?” I sent it back “In the store”. “But where”………and I look up as I am texting a response to see this guy staring at me.
He is 2-3 inches shorter than he claimed & his hair was supposed to be blondish & was brown. He did not look at all like I expected him to look. So I shook his hand & said it was nice to finally meet him. We went to the counter to get coffee & I ordered my decaf, nonfat, caramel macchiatto. He looks at me and says “wow.” I said “What?” He said “What is that?” I replied with “Don’t you go to Starbucks?” “Nope” He got a diet soda.
I told him to take his soda & sit while I fixed my coffee. He follwed me instead. I could see I was leading this whole thing so I did what I had to do and then walked past him to sit down. I took off my coat (and I looked good by the way…..red sweater, black skirt & heels) and he just stood there. I went with the idea that if this lawyer with free airline travel for 2 all of the time on Delta is worth anything, I may as well look killer amazing. I know that sounds so “un-me” but I am sad, depressed, finding incompatible weirdos, and want to have a relationship and if this is the way to do it, so be it. He sits down & then quickly stands up to take off his black bulky sweater so he can sit in his black tshirt with his muscley biceps sticking out. Yeah–not impressed. And I am into arms……..but the whole package had turned me off already so this did nothing to sway me.
I asked him if he was going to Fla that weekend as he had whined about earlier. “Well, I don’t want to go alone & I have this “thing” that I feel as if the plane is going to crash or something.” I said I’d go anyway seeing as the chances of that happening are slim to none. He said “I don’t feel like going alone. You can still come if you want to.” “Ummm…..we talked about this, remember?” “Yeah. It’s too soon. I guess you are right.” Ah, the statement of the evening. Right up there with Mr. Box of Rox’s “Absolutely”.
So we talked a bit more. I asked him about his bias towards uneducated people. He whined a bit that he wants someone who can speak with professionals. I pointed out that just because someone has a degree it only makes them wise in that area. They can still be a moron. He said he likes someone who can speak well…..like me. I said “I can do the Long Island thing instantly (and did it) if you’d like”. To which he recoiled and looked at me as if I had lost it. Shocking to many who have heard me speak without it.
I tried to talk about music and concerts & the beach & casinos but he kept going to students & school and plagiarism. BORING! And that’s what I said to him. He then smiles at me and says “You are a beautiful, intelligent woman. Your ex is a fool to have let you go.” I said “I know. They are all fools for having done so. ” and I smiled that facetious grin that I do every now and again. He was serious. I was screwing around.
At 10:25 I decided it was time to go. I figured I’d be there an hour & then leave. An hour is good whether you like the person or not. It gives a fair assessment of whether you would want to sit with them again or if there is just nothing between you. So I told him I had meetings the next morning–true—and that it was best if I went home to prepare for them. He offered to walk me to my car because he was staying at the bookstore. I said “That’s okay, thank you, but I walked myself in here.” He said “No no. It’s not right for you to leave alone.” I said “I came in alone. I’m a big girl & I think I can walk myself out.” So he walked me to the door & I immedaitely stuck out my hand so we could shake….no more awkward NYU moments for me! My final words were “I’ll speak to you soon!” good blow-off line if you ask me.
I pretty much ran out of there as fast as my heels could go. Thank goodness I will never have to do that again.